Getting over a break up advice is something that most everyone will need at some point during their life. It’s important to remember that setbacks and adversity, no matter how painful, allow you to grow as a person. Never let one person determine your worth or dictate your happiness. The intoxicating emotions associated with love are very fleeting. They can, and often will, disappear in an instant. Holding your breath under water may very well be easier to control than someones love for you. It’s completely normal to ask yourself why you weren’t good enough for them. There will be days where you don’t feel like getting out of bed. Days where you don’t even recognize the person you see in the mirror.
It’s a storm. The grief you feel early on will come at you in waves. Pummeling you into submission if you let them. Try to imagine yourself on a nice cruise with beautiful scenery, amazing music and great food. Life seems perfect, almost too good to be true. Suddenly you find yourself frantically trying to stay afloat in the water with wreckage all around. You grab a piece and hang on for dear life because you are exhausted. This wreckage could be something physical, a memory or perhaps a person but you latch on and float. All you can do is float and survive.
(You can watch my video on overcoming heartbreak here).
The waves crashing into you will be huge, unlike any you have ever seen. Forcefully and relentlessly hitting you without giving you time to catch your breath. Letting go and sinking is always in the back of your mind but I promise you will come out a stronger individual if you can hold on. Everyone heals differently and at a different pace. Perhaps you find yourself still floating weeks or even months later. The waves are still giant but they come at you slower and slower. Giving you time to breath and function. Giving you time to be yourself again. The storm will still knock you down but you will get back up and be stronger for it.
In between those waves is where you will find life and happiness. I can’t promise you that they the waves will stop but they will continue to get smaller until they become ripples. An anniversary, birthday or song may cause bigger ones to come but you will see them. You will be prepared because you have already survived the worst of it. Be proud of the scars you carry for they are a testament to life and a testament of the deep love you shared. It shows that you can love deeply, get cut and continue to love and prosper. Scars are a beautiful reminder of just how strong you are.
You can check out the short story, Wicked Scratch Marks, that I have written on love and heartbreak. Ronin and Rayna find themselves deeply attracted to the others scars. An unhealthy love teetering between beauty and disaster.